confused

confused of myself right now...at this moment ,I still thinking either to have medic in malaysia or russian..for honest,I prefer medic in Malaysia but I afraid of the pointer,,I never imagine to go abroad especially Russian..that is so out of my thinking..not even once.done with istikharah but I dont know why my heart strongly to say Malaysia..being an adult never as easy as I think...all decision on your own..it much fun to be 7 years old girl..oh by the way,I am turn 18 today..a year older suppose to be more wiser in choosing your own decision..but it seem the others way..TAYLOR perhaps the best for me.

A WAITING

    waiting for you to online ym last nite but you didnt show up..perhaps you are busy...nevermind,I will always wait for you as you are my love ones

THANK YOU ALLAH

alhamdulilah.....all the waiting all this while is worth...yesterday,I got a phone call from yayasan telling that I am selected for medic program in rusian..getting that call there is nothing that I can say except alhamdulilah..thank you Allah for giving me all this things....Insyaallah I will do the best for my parents and my family...never thinks that I will be able to reach this stage...ma abah I love you....I shall grant your wishes that you want to see one of your children to become a doctor.....

Taylor Swift - The Way I Loved You (w/lyrics) [HQ]

I MISS YOU

if you read my entry this time,I want you to know that I am missing you so much..it had been so long since I meet with you...yeah,I know that I am not that kind of romantic person..I never say that three words that you want to heard from my own mouth but for your information,I really love you..you are the only man in my heart..your present in my life is like a blessing..I can never hope for a better person than you...I hope our relationship will remain forever even though when we are far away one day...now,I really missing you a lot..since having you in my life,I learn new things in my life..I learn to love someone others than my family and my friends..I learn to give a space in my heart for you,,my special one and the most important,,I learn that to have someone to care of you is awesome...yes,my loves one,,if you read this,,I want you to know that there is no doubt that I am so in love with you...;p..you are the best man that I can wish for...love you so much..muahhhhhxxx

MORNING..:)

good morning..:)..I know it kind too late too say good morning but nevermind..LOL..wake up in the morning at own home in such a blast..sleep in your own bed,your own room and the most important,being wake up by your own parents..yeay3...actually today I woke up a little bit late..a little*wink**he3...as i wake up,I immediately go to my favourite place in my home that is.........KITCHEN..LOL..looking into the fridge for things that can be cooked and then of course I need to cooking my own..you think my home got maid??>..he3...and for today breakfast is fried noodle..the taste??..quite okay but not as tasty as my mom cooking...ha3...that's all for this morning...love you all my friends who reading my entry and I hope you all in good shape..assalamualikum and have a good day even though the sun is hiding today..*wink3*..;p

HOME SWEET HOME

Yeay!!finally I am home...well,being far from home even only for a while make me really feel homesick..I wonder what if one day I will be studying far away from home...he3...well,since I am home for a week before going back to my brother house,there is a lot of things in my mind to do..here is my list for a week at home,, 1)sleep(HIBERNATE) 2)drive around with my new license 3)going to my bbq with my classmate this wednesday..yeay!! 4)going to beach with syahirah and my belove now you see that I have lots of planning to do..he3..hopefully my plan can work out..yeay3..cannot wait for bbq and going to beach with sya n beloved one...

rusian or egypt?

rusian or egypt??....that is what in my minds now....since,I aim to be a doctor I need to be wise seeking for every opportunity that I have as the opportunity to pursuing study in this field is limited.For myself,I dont really bother the place but what I most concern is SPONSORSIP...if I go for egypt I need to spend my own money first for the first year and by second year if I get at least jayyid jiddan or mumtaz for my result automatically I will get sponsorship by MARA or JPA..but now, I kind of doubt either I will be able to get jayyid jiddan at least for first,,it kind scaring me,,plus minus,for the first year it cost for RM 23000 and all pay on your own...my brother say it is okay to go as he want to pay for it...he say as a gift for flying colour result for spm and he want to see me becoming a doctor,,,and for rusian,,I need to wait for yayasan terengganu answer to reply back my form either I be choosen or not,,if I get it thankfully as I dint have to use my brother money and dont have to worry if I did not get the goal for the first year..hopefully I get to do medic at rusian under yayasan or not after raya for sure I am flying to egypt and for a year no fb,blogging and phones as I need to struggle to get good result in order to ensure getting sponsorship....pray for me so that I am getting rusian..hu3...

ANNOYING!!

when thinking of driving,I will immediately out of mood...arghhhhhhhhhhh!!,,seriously driving is not the things that I good....before,driving the car for real,I always thinking that driving is fun and relax but the fact is,it is so though and dangerous..the test is just around the corner,but yet I still cant drive well on the road....everytime after my driving teacher asking me to drive on the road,immediately I will become so tensed and lost of mood because I know something for sure...that,I drive horribly,,hopefully,when the test I will make it and pass it...dont want to pay for repeating...driving make me lost my mood..damn....and then the motorcycle,,,I thought can have early test but then the teacher said I still unable to drive it perfectly..what the hell?...urghhh...hate it!!!!postponed and when postponed that means that my license will be late tooo...I hate every machine that moving...very annoying...

S.O.R.R.Y

if I made you mad of me,I am so sorry It was all out of my planning I hope by now you already okay I understand if you mad of me but please dont be quiet like this because I will missing you I know it is my fault but please forgive me I am so sorry...please forgive me...

R.A.N.D.O.M

According to the Qur'an,love is to be shown to those who deserve it Those who do not deserve it are not to be loved We are even distance ourselves from them emotionally or at least,to not feel inclined towards them But those who deserve love,deserve it because their virtue The only being who deserves absolute love is Allah,who created us all Allah brought us into existence,proffered us with the countless blessings we enjoy, Showed us the way, and promised us ever lasing paradise He helped us out of every anxiety and graciously hears our every call It is He who feeds us until we are satisfied,cures us when we are ill and then restores our spirits

C.O.O.K.I.N.G

cooking,,yupz you got it right...since it had beean a long vocation for me after SPM, I start to learn cooking slowly but for sure not following my mom's recipies..okay,I am a little bit hard headed when following others words but that is me..LOL...when coming to cooking, yes I can cook but not as tasty as my mom...I am totally fail when it come to adding flavouring...ha3..usually it will be lack of salt..,to cover it I just say to them it is a healthy food..LOL...actually I dont prefer adding too much salt on my food as I know the risk of having too much salt in your food that is hypertension, so to avoid it use less salt even it make your food become less tasty..ha3...for the time being, the food that I consider myself good at it is CHICKEN SOUP,,yummy..fried vegetables,,not bad and my most favourite something with chilies as the sauce,,chilies tempe,chillies fish,,ha3...for dessert, I quite good as I already done this thing since I was in form2..so,considering myself not bad..ha3..to my friends,IZYAN and NAJMI,,come to my house and I will cook something special for both of you...he3....please give comment..LOL..that's all and I hope my cooking will be improved...or the sake of myself too because I like to eat...ha3..:)

I MISS HIM

it had been a week since his last message to me...that day I text him but he did not reply my text...just if he read my entry,,I want him to know that I miss him so much...that day,,I open my yahoo messenger and I saw him on the name list who online,,,but I did not buzz him as that time even I was so curious how come he able to online yahoo as he got no internet..plus to think logically by myself,,it is impossible as that time is already night..I dont know either he is lying or not as I am too afraid to ask him...I hope that he will text me soon as I am missing him so much...really looking forward to see him even just a minutes cause I miss him so much...LOVE YOU and hope YOU WILL SAY THE same thing too me...you are my only one and if you see my entry please send me a text..missing you a lots...

V.O.C.A.T.I.O.N

V.O.C.A.T.I.O.N..yupz..it is vocation..since I just finish my big exam 2 month ago, I was consider having a vocation until the result out..but,,yet instead having a vocation I am stuck at home..when,I thinking of having vocation, I asked myself with who??..friends?..of course not as I can befriends with others but to be as close until we hang out together maybe not..and then my family?...all of them busy..so,I decided to wait until my younger sister having holiday..and when I said to her asking to accompany me to go for a vocation,,she with poker face answering that she dont want to go...if you being me at that time you will feel sad too..I want to spend my time with my family that's why I asked her to go too...hmm,if I sulk she said I ma being too serious,but YES I have to be serious...it not like I always have this chance...yes,I am sulking because neither her or my sister ignoring my wish to go for short holiday with me...of course they feel bored as they already free from home and can always go out with their friends,,but for me??..to go out with friends like others teenager so not as me...it always with family whether it is holiday or just to hang out..so,can this time both of you come with me,,,it not like I asking you to buy me expensive gift,,,just want you to spend your time with me...alone at home can be so bored but you know that you can never complaint as home is always the best comfort place...

upset

hmmm....U.P.S.E.T...that's is the thing that I feel right now...no matter how hard I try or I do all the house chores, yet,I still not being my mom favourites...it always either my sister or my 'adik' is the apple of the eyes of my mom..I can never be her favourites...I still remember when I was in primary school,,no matter how good my score is I never can satisfied her...but when comes to my kakak and adik everything is good...not a single comment at all...no matter either the result is not that good...but when they got good result,,they got appreciation from my mom..meanwhile,,I even getting a good result I never had the appreciation as long as I cant beat my friends and got first place in my class...and now,,,whenever I am doing the house chores,it never be as good as them as well..it not like I only know how to sleep and eat only while waiting for my result..I do all the house cleaning but i I am sorry mom if I cant be as good as them..but, I am trying mom...hopefully youwill know how to appreciate it instead being sarcasm..love you mom..

driving car

today is my first time driving car...ooooh,it is so fun but at the same time so scary...at the first my instructor asked me to play with gear and then when i quite good with it my instructor allow me to drive in circuit...30 minutes spent on circuit to make myself improve on it...later my instructor asked me to drive at the road...it was so nervous experience but at the same time was so fun... hopefully I will be a good driver soon...hu3

PRAYING HARD FOR S8 A'S

Dup dap dup dap...just if you can hear the sound of my heart beating now...it is really anxious when thinking either it will be all A'S or it will be just my dream...I really want all A'S for my spm as this will be mine ticket for becoming a doctor...a doctor is what my parents really want to see me..so,I need to fullfill tehir dream either by hook or crook...by now,as it getting closer to the day of SPM results will be announced,I just can hoping and praying that it will be okay...just like one of the line in the three idiots 'all is well'..but among all the 9 subjects that I am taking there are three subjects that i am so worry..and it will be english,bio n physics...hopefully this three will be A...insyaallah...if Allah will it I will get what I want all this while...

I MISS THIS TWO KIDS

hu3...it had been so long since the last time I meet with this two kids...it is my niece...the last time Isee them, the little one still cant crawl and the sister still not in school...now the little one already can crawl and look even cuter...and his sister already in school and even can play guitar now...how I miss them...they are my soul and my life...I was so thankful to have them in my life...and thanks to my brother and my sis in law too for bringing them into this world...their present really had cherish my world...their laugh, their joy, their behave will make me smile everytime thinking of them...hoping to see them soon...lots oflove and missing salma zara sofieya and zafar sharf waldan..your guys are aunty jie sweetheart...

B.O.R.E.D

It is already midnight but yet still cant get my eyes close...BORED...thinking of having chat but with who?...I dont really have many friends so it kind pity to my friends especially the one who close to me as I like to bother them...and the most one I like to have chat is 'THAT PERSON'...it so fun to have chat...at least I can talk with someone...ha3.,,perhaps they will get bored because i like to bother them..to all my friends especially izyan nazihah,najmi najihah and 'that person'. thanks a lot for having chat with me...he3...love you all..:)

JEALOUSY??

ooh...wake up in morning with smile on my face, but all of sudden all the smile were pull off from my face when I log in into my facebook account..what the thing that make me feeling bad all of sudden?...it is the picture of 'that person' with someone that he used to like before...ha3...jealous perhaps...they seem to be cute along and that girl much prettier and cuter than me, so it will nothing unusual if girl like her having many fans...maybe before this I say that I dont really care but the real is I do feel treaten a little bit...ha3...that what the power of jealous can do to human...but I am not that type of personthat like to control others....perhaps I should be more open minded and let what past be past...but as what shakspear say 'to forget somaone that we love is like to try the name of person that we never know'..so,for me I had to accept that the girl is his first love so it will be common thing if they being a good friend..so,I just need to go with the flow and put my trust to 'that person'..and I do know that I can believe him...

how I meet my special person

morning...suddenly today I think to share my special moment in my life on this blog...as you can see from the headline it about how I meet my special person in my life...and yes I have found the one that I love most..and how I know it is 'that person' that I have looking all this while...perhaps this is what I call destiny...ever since I met him when I was in form 3, I know immediately that it him that I looking all this while...but I never thinking of involve in this kind of matter as that time I still in school and my focus on that time was studying...on that time I just can say it not love yet but I want to be friends with that person...plus he seem nice and teachers always praise that person for having good attitude...and that what me more interesting to know him....and later somehow we get involved in gossips that created by our friends and later we getting closer...I mean before this we never dare to talk to each other at tuition, but later I dare enough to talk with hi...but at school I never dare enough to talk to 'that person' even to say hi because he soon to be quiet and vice versa with me...I worry to talk with him as I afraid that he will think what this girl doing?...ha3..as later time passed on I find out that he is moving to another school after getting pmr result...at that time I knew that we will not meet again as now we in different school...but somehow I meet him again at library...he was doing his homework at there and it kind surprisng me as before this I used to go there,,,but never see him around...and it kind make me feel happy to meet 'that person again' but even I dont know why...but I never go near him and chat with him as I afraid what he he will think of me...until one day he come to my table and have chat with me...happy but dont know why I feel that way...and how it can become like now...I mean he become someone special to me...just wait for another post... P/S:for the special person that read my post I want you to know that having you in my life is a bless..:)

time to be little thinnner??

ha3.....seem to be funny is not?...all of sudden thinking of trying to be a little bit thinner..not because of thinking to look gorgeous or beautiful, but I think it is the time to take care my health...I need to take care my own health if I want to take care my family especially my mom and dad...I already promise to myself to be a doctor one day so that later when i graduated I can work near to my parents house....so that went they getting old and unable to take care themself I will be able to look after them and treat them as they treat me since I was a baby and now become this big...hopefully..but before all of that become a reality I need to take care myself firstly...for this moment try to reduce the intake of rice...and exercise just start since end month of 12,,but seem nothing changes...perhaps need time to loose some weight...hopefully I will be able to do it...as well hoping my dream to become a doctor will be achieved

.....salma zara sofieya..that is my little niece...she is our princess and my sweetheart..now she already 7 years old and yes...she is going to school this year..she is a joyful girl and smart..we can never say no to her...we love her so much and I hope mt little sofieya will grow up as a good person...love you sofieya